I am in the midst of this horrible quarter-life crisis so I find myself constantly looking back to my teen years, the good ol' days of innocence and ignorance. To make life easier for you, I compiled 6 things that I picked from my list of I wish I had/hadn't done in my teen years.
I yearned so bad to taste life, I let go of the real thing I had to begin with - my studies. I barely attended my classes, I handed in my assignments late and I dismiss consultations with my lecturers. At the end of the school year, I feel left out when I see some of my friends getting into the same prestigious university that I would like to be in.
I'm not saying getting into a prestigious school is all that. Matter of fact, I am a firm believer in different spectrums of success. But there's a huge difference between, doing all you can and getting so much, and doing just enough to only get so much. In the later, you would be constantly reminded that just maybe, maybe if you had worked harder, you would be in a better place. And, the sole reason of why you're there, in a place that you're not happy in, is yourself. You let yourself down.
When people get old, they regret the things that they didn't get to do more than the things they did.
2. Be vulnerable for love
I always think that every one should meet this one person, once in their lives. The one person whom we would do almost anything for. We break rules for more adventures with them. Disobey our parents to stay with them. Defend our relationship when others criticise it. And even make sacrifices to make them happy.
Our first love changes us, because for the first time in our life, we let somebody else see parts of us, which we have never revealed to anyone else before. They change us by making us more vulnerable. They become our best friend. They make us realise the definition of intimacy.
Then, they leave us, or we leave them. And we find ourselves stuck in the bed with our hearts literally aching. Whatever the reason of the break up is, we would undergo a self-transformation just to get our lives back together, or to get over the fact that they are not our last.
And when that's all over, you'll be stronger. You'll know who you are. And from then,with the next person that you love, you'll know how to take care of your heart better. You will love yourself, more than anything else.
3. Meet new people
Communication is the key of life, and I think our generation is missing on this concept big time. I've had my fair share of times when technology was just a word, and also in times where you can do anything with just a tap on your screen. It's 2014 now, we can spend hours lounging on the couch whatsapping our friends , or creeping on everyone's business on Facebook.
Nowadays, we are so caught up in our own little circle of friends, our comfort zone. I, for one, could be heavily charged for this crime. I love that they laugh at my jokes, they understand my feelings and can read our minds. Most importantly, they know when I would like to be left alone. They just get us.
But, don't reject the idea that meeting new people would open doors for you. You'll be more diverse, and it's an attractive quality, really. Life is too short, so meet all the people that you can meet. But remember to always be yourself. Those who are meant to be in your life, will make an effort to be in it.
4. Be courageous
Be daring to try every thing under the sun.
You are there and life exists. Make your lives extraordinary, wasted talents are the saddest thing that could happen to a human being. You don't want to look back and think that you have not lived at all.
Carpe Diem, my friends.
5. Experiment with your style
I don't know if I should be proud to say that I've boxed up half of my closet to make way for my new, formal wears. And, I just feel like I've outgrown a lot of styles, I just don't have the confidence anymore to wear crop tops and shorts, because walking down the road, you'll bump to a 16-year-old wearing the same thing as you.
That's just one day of your whole entire life, wearing something that you never thought you would in a million years. And who knows, you might end up liking it.
Fashion is all about expressing yourself, and how could you know who you are if you never experiment?
6. Judge Less, Accept more
Judge, but don't condemn, as that ignites the desire for revenge and kills the love within.
We judge people when our desires or expectations aren't met. But the root cause of judging, is our ego. The ego compares self with others and then it starts to compete, trying to prove that it is better. Then, it isn't long until the criticism comes, which quickly leads to condemnation.
Condemning things would limit your life, you shut out things that you judged not to be good for you. And then, you can only live so much.
Learn to accept people the way they are, they're doing the best that they can at that moment. We always want to be accepted unconditionally, but we rarely accept others unconditionally. Judge others and you will be judged. Accept others, and you will be accepted.